Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Like you're running out of time

I'm on vacation with my friends! It's pretty great.

We've rented a beach house for a week and the first half of it is busier than the second half because we have more people for the first part of the trip. I'm packing in lots of interaction, silliness, food, shopping, movies . . . and lots of swimming! I don't even really like swimming that much but I have only been here since Saturday and I've already used all three bathing suits I brought. (We have a washing machine, don't worry.)

Anyway, last night my friends and I were checking out Hamilton and there's a sort of contradiction between Alexander Hamilton's philosophy of life and Aaron Burr's. Burr waits for things, lays low until he sees an opportunity, and is very patient and plays his cards close to his chest, so to speak. Hamilton chases everything openly, is very opinionated, and very aggressive about what he wants. He's not willing to wait for it. One of the songs asks Hamilton why he writes "like he's running out of time." (I mean, he kind of was, retrospectively.)

That's kinda how I usually am. Lately I haven't been doing a lot of fiction writing, but at least historically I'm more like Hamilton--always kinda chasing what I need to do and being all driven and stuff.

There's a scene where Hamilton's wife, Eliza, and her sister, Angelica, are encouraging Hamilton to take a break and come upstate with them for some down time. He refuses after being tempted and says he has to get his work done. So they leave him there and he falls into other temptations because of the pressures and stress. Hmm.

This isn't something someone made up. It's someone's actual life, even though we're guessing at some of it.

I've been enjoying my vacation, but I'm sort of also itching to DO THINGS with my free time while I'm away from the office. Do some writing, do some drawings, get stuff done. I've been having a really good time chilling with my friends and pretending I don't have this whole other "things I want to be doing" aspect to my version of "vacation," and I'm actually surprised at how easy it's been to just have fun with them. They're a really great group of people and even though it's been three days I haven't had even a moment where I wish I could just run away into a room and work on my own stuff without anyone talking to me. That's really unusual for me.

But I also really do want to make some of this vacation count toward creativity and maybe even complete that short story I've been playing with. Maybe get ahead on the webcomic. Do some other stuff. Answer some mail. Play catch-up.

Still, there are the Angelicas and Elizas of the world telling me I should just take a break from everything I usually do, and I wonder sometimes how right they are. Whether I'd actually be more productive in the long run if I took a vacation from everything I usually do. 

I guess we'll see what I decide to do. And we'll see how I feel about what I decide to do after I've done it.


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